Far From Perfect: The Good Girl's Battle Against Temptation and Failure

"Only those who try to resist temptation know how strong it is...We never find out the strength of the evil impulse inside us until we try to fight it: and Christ, because He was the only man who never yielded to temptation, is also the only man who knows to the full what temptation means—the only complete realist.” (C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity)

The Path of Temptation
From a very young age I was a student in the art of sinning and a master of deceit in covering my tracks. My first real memory of committing a sin was shoplifting at age three. I remember standing in front of the check out counter when I spotted the Archie's Comic Book. The brightly colored front page was too much temptation for a three-year-old toddler and so without giving it another thought, my pudgy little hands reached for the book and hurriedly stuffed it inside my coat. You can imagine the look of horror on my dad's face when he brought me home from shopping that day only to discover his angelic little blonde haired, blue eyed daughter was a thief!


Temptation. We all deal with it. While it may seem cute and funny in the life of a three-year-old, it consequentially grows more serious as the years go by. The frightening truth for the "good girl" is that she is the last to realize the dangers of temptation because she tries so hard to achieve perfection in her own strength. In this post I want to share two pitfalls the good girl falls into when dealing with temptation and failure.

On my blog we've been doing a studying on the Lord's prayer. I need to admit to you that I've been thoroughly stumped over the meaning of, "Lead us not into temptation". Why would Jesus encourage His disciples to ask God not to lead them into temptation when God's character would never lead a person to sin against Him? After spending a long time studying this and discussing this with my dad (who loves studying the Greek), I came to a very simple conclusion: We are not praying that God would keep us from going where He wants to take us but rather protect us from the desires of our own flesh. The idea of "lead us not" is the same as saying "keep us from" or "help us not to yield to". 

How Does the Good Girl Handle Temptation?
"A girl with a good reputation easily makes friends at Bible college, effortlessly impresses the parents of boyfriends, and has little trouble coasting into the role of pastor's wife. But if she hides behind her good reputation, there is little room for correction, and the good girl is in danger of being her own compass rather than having a softened heart to the leading of God as he speaks through his Word, friends, or family members." (Emily P. Freeman, Grace for the Good Girl) 

As I look back over my own life I see two major pitfalls that have shaped the patterns of my "good girl" mentality. Here is what it looks like. When temptation knocks on the door, the good girl dutifully ignores it's beckoning. She becomes frustrated with herself when the temptation grows stronger and begins to battle the voice of reason in her heart. her strength can only last so long and then she gives in to the temptation. At this point there are two paths she is prone to take: 

• Allowing the tempter to become the accuser. As soon as the good girl falls she battles the guilt of her own sin. The voices of the enemy and her own taunt her with the shamefulness of failure.
• Allowing the art of perfectionism to mask her failure. The good girl stuffs her failures deep within and continues to protect her good reputation. She doesn't realize this as a fault but rather a survival mechanism that allows her to put a lid on the guilt and shame. She refuses to be transparent before others because her heart has refused to do so before God. 

These two pitfalls build a cycle deep within the life of a good girl that carries her further and further away from the freedom God so willingly offers her. Although she tries to do what is right, there is a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach that she will never be perfect enough. The good girl is stuck in a place of perfectionism instead of running to the perfect one. She becomes her own judge and condemns what God has justly forgiven under His grace and mercy. What practical insight does the Bible offer on God's perspective with handling temptation and failure?

God's Way of Handling Temptation and Failure 
The Lord's prayer invites us to pray, "Lead us not into temptation". Why? Because if we don't pray we will fail. If we don't look to God grace to help us we won't survive the battle against temptation. Here is something I want each of you to remember: temptation is not a sin but yielding to temptation is a sin.

• Pray for help: In the book of James it says that God doesn't tempt us but we are drawn away by our own fleshly desires which is why Jesus told His disciples to "Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak." (Matthew 26:41) The Holy Spirit will help us in our weaknesses. We only have to ask!
• Confess your faults to God: Be open and honest before God and share your struggles with Him. "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:9)
• Confess your faults to others: Transparency is your best defense against the temptations of the enemy. "Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed." (James 5:16)
• Renew your mind on truth: "casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ." (2 Corinthians 10:5) 
• Don't be a lone ranger: Each of us need "battle buddies". We were never meant to fight the battle against temptation alone. "Two are better than one, Because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, For he has no one to help him up." (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10)

About two weeks ago, I had my own battle with temptation and failure. The two pitfalls of the good girl tugged at my heart as I battled once more the cycle of shame and failure. But I'm slowly learning to do it God's way. Yes, it's humbling but it is freeing. I even called a good friend for accountability. Does it matter the size and magnitude of the failure? No! Sin is sin. Consequences may differ but the fact is sin is still sin. The cost of freedom requires the stripping away of the perfectionistic mask and becoming the transparent and humble woman that God has called you to be. There is power in crying out to God, "Lead me not into temptation". Don't neglect that prayer request! 

Questions? You can either email me or leave me a voicemail or text with my google number: 646-504-626