Three Reasons to Choose Your Resolutions Carefully

"I said to a man who stood at the gate of the year: 'Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown'; and he replied, 'Go into the darkness and put your hand into the hand of God. That shall be to you better than a light and safer than a known way!'" (quoting from a poem by M. L. Harkins)

It's January 5th. Assumedly most of you have already created your New Year's resolution list. Your resolve is high and it feels good to practice new disciplines and meet new goals...but what happens to that resolve by the end of the year? Why are we so quick to create a list of good things, only to fail by December 31st?

The Good Girl's Masquerade: Emotional Dishonesty in a World Full of Pain

"The only antidote to the poisonous lie of performance is forgiveness. We have to receive forgiveness in order to live free because we cannot give what we have not first received. Our masks complicate this process because we know it isn't good to hold on to unforgiveness. So we hide behind our mask of indifference or we get busy in our performance to hide the hurt, the anger, and the pain that has been inflicted upon us. It is a toxic, exhausting way to live. It is not the way of Jesus." (Emily P. Freeman)

The Mask of Perfectionism
In my last post I tackled the subject of God's forgiveness through the eyes of the "good girl". "She want's to please God but deep inside she feels like an absolute failure. The more she tries to hide behind the mask of perfectionism the greater her heart condemns herself." The good girl struggles with an inaccurate view of God which makes it difficult for her to receive God's love and forgiveness.

Confessions of a "Good Girl"

The good girl goes to church every time the doors are open. She doesn't let on when she is having a bad day because others may think she has backslidden. Instead she defaults to her Christian tag lines such as, "God is teaching me so much" or "I'm learning to be thankful in all things". The good girl doesn't share her struggles with family and friends because she feels the pressure of living up to the reputation of the "good girl". She want's to please God but deep inside she feels like an absolute failure. The more she tries to hide behind the mask of perfectionism the greater her heart condemns herself.

This description of the good girl is a picture of my own past but I believe many girls who have grown up in solid Christian homes can also identify with the "good girl" mentality. Even to this day, I struggle with feeling the need to search my own heart and habitually confess to God every time I go to prayer. Ironically, the very thing I hope will draw me closer to God causes me to feel more distant from His presence.

In my series of blog posts on The Lord's prayer, we've covered the topics of God being our Father, God's Holiness, having a Kingdom mindset, praying the will of God and understanding our needs versus wants. Half way through this prayer Jesus brings up the subject of repentance: "Forgive us our debts". I want to tackle the subject of confession through the eyes of the good girl and through my own struggles with understanding the grace of God.